Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

The graphic art in the plastic surgery center's ad was what caught my eye. It was a large photo of Michaelangelo's David, one of the most exquisite and realistic depictions of the nude male ever created. However, in the ad, amateurish airbrushing over his groin area had rendered him anatomically neutered, as smooth and genderless…

MUSIC AND MEMORIES

"Music has charms to soothe the savage beast, to soften rocks or bend a knotted oak." I'd say that would depend on whether the music was good or bad. My father's mellow baritone could soothe a savage beast. Mom's caterwauling could certainly soften rocks or bend a knotted oak, as well as cause the wallpaper…

HEY, NATURE! SHUT THE HECK UP!

I haven't had a good night's sleep since I moved from a busy subdivision to a semi-rural area. In spite of what you may have heard, there is nothing tranquil about nighttime in the country. When I moved here, I anticipated quiet nights of restful slumber, leaves rustling in the gentle breeze through an open…

FAKE FRIENDS AND FAMILY

Just like in the 1980s movie Poltergeist, "They're b-a-a-a-ck." In the mid-1990s, there was a trend in lawn decor which consisted of life-sized silhouettes of plywood people (often painted all black), leaning against trees, bent over flower beds, or just captured in mid-stride across the yard. Occasionally, there was a bear or other animal. It…